The Funny Side of Brain Fog in Your 40s: A Tale of Lost Phones, Car Keys and A Very Silly Goose

You know you’re in your 40s when the term “brain fog” stops sounding like a clever excuse and starts feeling like a permanent fixture of your daily life.

 I’m not just talking about the occasional forgetting of where you put your glasses (which, let’s face it, are on your head ninety per cent of the time), but a full-blown, heart-racing, panic-inducing experience where you genuinely believe you’ve lost something important only to find it right in front of you moments later. And the worst part? You usually do this in front of a perfectly innocent, unsuspecting person who now thinks you’re the human embodiment of chaos.

Take, for example, the time I lost my phone while shopping in Home Bargains. Now, I know what you’re thinking: How on earth does someone lose their phone in a store? Well, buckle up, because this is where it gets good. There I was, merrily walking through the aisles, looking for some bargains, when I suddenly realised that my phone was nowhere to be found. Cue panic. I mean, it wasn’t just any phone. It was my phone—the one that holds all my photos, my work, my top-quality video content and a myriad of sensitive information.

I started to retrace my steps with the fervour of a woman on a mission. I walked up and down the aisles like a bloodhound sniffing for a scent, scanning every surface, my heart rate speeding up as I imagined my life without my phone. But alas, nothing. Zip. Zilch. The horror.

In a desperate bid to hold on to my sanity, I marched up to the service desk and asked a young man for help. He had a full tribal sleeve of tattoos, and I felt an odd sense of solidarity with him as he nodded at me with a look of confusion. Then, in the calmest voice possible, he asked, “What does the screen photo look like, just in case it’s handed in?”

I stared at him blankly. What photo? My brain, in full fog mode, tried to recollect something about the screen. And then, like a lightning bolt, it hit me. “It’s a cartoon goose with the words ‘Silly Goose on the Loose’ written on it. And I have a sticker on the back that says ‘Got Too Silly.’”

As an Essex native, I’m fully aware that I already sound ridiculous in Derry with my thick accent. But saying “silly goose on the loose” in front of a crowded queue at the till in Home Bargains? That was a new level of cringe. I could feel the stares. I mean, I get it, it’s a funny screen photo, but in that moment I just wanted to crawl under a rock and hide.

The tattooed man nodded, seemingly unfazed, but I could tell I had made his day. How often does someone come in looking for a lost phone with that particular background? But the irony wasn’t lost on me. Of course I had a cartoon goose sticker. Of course I had something as ridiculous as that on the back of my phone. And yes, I did indeed get too silly.

But the plot thickens. After leaving the store, I realised that I had lost more than just my phone. I felt like I had lost my arm. I got into my car and, without my Android Auto connection, had to settle for listening to local radio. Can you imagine? I couldn’t even Bluetooth my favourite tunes! I spent the whole drive home thinking about how, in that moment, I had truly lost everything.

I finally arrived home and, with a dramatic sigh, told my other half, “I’ve lost my phone, I’ve lost my work, I’ve lost all my photos… I’ve lost my entire life.”

He looked at me like I was being a bit dramatic (which, okay, maybe I was), but I was still in full self-loathing mode. I sulked up to my bedroom, convinced that the world had somehow conspired to take away the one thing that held my sanity together. And then, as I sat sulking in my room, my eyes fell on the side table. There it was, sitting pretty, charging away like nothing had happened. My phone.

Why am I like this?

Another gem of a story from my recent life was when I lost my car keys for an entire week. Yes, a whole week. The panic was real. I was ready to dip into my savings and fork out around £400 for a new Audi key. We tore the house apart—literally. The bins were checked, the sofa cushions were dug through, and the dog even got a quick once-over. But no keys.

Then, after a week of despair, I decided to check a cardigan I hadn’t worn in a while. Guess what I found? My car keys, sitting neatly in the pocket. After all that stress and panic, they had been in my cardigan pocket the entire time

Why am I like this?

It got me thinking… Is this just brain fog, or could it be something else? As it turns out, I’m not alone in this. Apparently, brain fog in your 40s is pretty common, especially for women. As we navigate the uncharted waters of perimenopause (hello, hormonal changes), our brains can sometimes go on a little holiday, leaving us to scramble and wonder why we can’t remember where we put our own heads, let alone our phones or keys.

According to research, brain fog can be a real thing during perimenopause, and it’s not just about forgetfulness—it can affect your cognitive function in ways that make even simple tasks feel like monumental challenges. Stress, too, can play a huge part. Ever notice how when you’re stressed it’s like your brain decides to take a holiday? That’s not just you. It’s science.

But hey, let’s not take ourselves too seriously. We’ve all been there, right? Losing things, stressing over things we might have lost, only to find them right under our noses. And as much as I’d love to blame perimenopause and stress, maybe I’m just a little too silly sometimes. A little bit of brain fog is just part of the fun of getting older, right? At least I’ve got a cartoon goose to remind me of my more ridiculous moments.

So next time you lose something, don’t panic. It’s probably just brain fog. Or stress. Or, you know, that cardigan you haven’t worn in a while. Either way, you’ll find it eventually… or at least you’ll have a good laugh about it when you do.